So, the way it works over here is that the weekly emails and podcast episodes get ready several days in advance. Saves everyone on the YKAL team some stress and what can I say— I like to be prepared.
And then the events in Charlottesville, Virginia happened on Saturday.
I’ve been sitting here at home with my kids sick over it, spending long moments staring off into space feeling worried, helpless, hopeless, angry, and afraid. (Which I know this is my privilege to do so). Wondering if I should halt all podcast episodes and other events I have going on. Seems ludicrous to talk about anything but that.
The thing is, racism is all around us. It’s in our faces. And it can only be dismantled if we talk about it, get uncomfortable confronting and admitting our own biases, rinse and repeat. There is more, but as I have mentioned— I am not the expert here. If you missed some episodes where we dive more into this, you can check them out here and here.
Yes, we can choose kindness and love and all those wonderful things, but we cannot sit by and do nothing. Reading and listening is a great first step. Some great pieces of writing I’ve read lately are Most Women You Know Are Angry— And That’s All Right, by Laurie Penny, and Dear White Women: This Is Definitely Us, by Janelle Hanchett (which, btw, Janelle is coming on the recovery series podcast in December. Get ready).
And at the end of the day, the beat still goes on. We can do both— work on our own personal development, live our lives, and love our people and at the same time try to dismantle the racism all around us.
Hey Ass Kickers!
In this episode I’m bringing on a guest that has a similar story as mine, in that he too had a painful divorce that became the catalyst for his better life. John Kim created the blog The Angry Therapist, and although he has a background in clinical therapy, he’s now unconventional and shaking up this model and actually forming a movement.
You’ll hear us talk a lot about the differences between therapy (as most people know it) and life coaching – particularly the style that John uses to bring out the best in each and every client he works with.
Like John, I’ve always felt that the clinical therapy route is somewhat outdated, with the therapist often being put up on a pedestal with the client thinking he or she has a “perfect life”. You’ll find that he’s as real as they come though; he’s raw and transparent, and openly admits that he himself is a work in progress. I think this is why his message resonates with so many people…
In this episode you’ll hear:
- How the Internet and new technology is creating a whole new landscape in the world of personal development (9 minutes and 50 seconds)
- John was leading two lives and why he thought of it as a Clark Kent/Superman existence (13:20)
- How to create “safe containers” that promote growth – instead of stunting it (16:48)
- If you don’t embrace every part of your story, this happens….(18:53)
- He shares the 4 stages that we go through with our own stories (20:23)
- The single biggest misconception about life coaches (21:38)
- The question John asks his clients that sets boundaries and motivates true change (24:33)
- His daily non-negotiables, and what he considers his “nectar” (25:45)
I hope you enjoy listening to this conversation with John as much as I did having it! Tune in to this episode and you’ll also get an update on all the exciting things that are going on here at Your Kick-Ass Life, as well as the latest on my upcoming book that’s being published very soon, in January 2018!
Resources from this podcast
It’s back! Tanning, Tacos, and Transformation is coming this October, where we’ll be hosting workshops on all things negative self-talk, confidence, and communication.The early bird price is back! Join us today for only $497 for this 4-day event!
John’s Website & Podcast
John’s book, The Angry Therapist
His Very First Blog Post, My Fucking Feelings
His Facebook Page
Jen Sincero’s episode
The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk. M.D.
Seth Godin’s altMBA program is here
John Kim pioneered the online life coaching movement seven years ago, quickly building a following of 58,000 Facebook fans, 15,000 Instagram fans and a sizable email list. Seven years ago, John Kim went through a divorce which led to his total re-birth. He became an unconventional therapist by working out of the box, growing his audience of like-minded people through Tumblr from the ground up. He built out a coaching team and started a movement to change the way we change.
John is a published writer and speaker, his own podcast Asking For a Friend hit #78 on the top health charts on iTunes. John Kim’s first published book “The Angry Therapist: A No BS Guide to Finding and Living Your Own Truth” (Parallax Press) on building a meaningful life will be on shelves April 2017.